a life at lucas house update

Summer is cruising by...
In just a short month, I will be sending JT to 6th grade orientation.
Here is a photo recap although I don't have photos of us swimming, which is what we spend our days doing. The chickens have turned in to little fish.

Some shots from JT's final baseball game of his season and Zach playing with his summer league team (yes that is smurf turf you see - strangest ballpark ever in Dripping Springs).

The girls have a growing obsession with Star Wars so one day we tried making Star Wars cookies. I was short on proper supplies so we tried a shortbread recipe. As you can see by KitKat's reaction, they didn't turn out how we wanted. And to be clear, they are dancing in that upper left photo.

Our first adventure bowling. KitKat kicked all our butts.

Baseball in the backyard in our princess nightgowns. The night before KitKat fell asleep crying about playing baseball.



Lulu on the left and Kit Kat on the right
I just wish I knew what they were talking about.


spovegas baby!

The boys and I are packing our bags in a few weeks for a trip to SpoVegas! It has been 12 years since I've returned to my home town. I won't lie to say I am a bit excited. I have grandiose plans to torture the boys by making them drive all over Spokane to some of my favorite places and for them to actually see mountains. I wish I had time to take them to Helena but Spokane will have to suffice for now. 


I am also hoping to catch up with a few friends that I haven't seen in a bit although hopefully we will be a little more refined than we were 20 years ago.



I spent yesterday trying to think of some deep thoughts about 14 years of marriage but I am not sure I have anything profound to add. Marriage is hard and it is also fabulous. How profound is that?

“Sometimes I wonder if men and women really suit each other. Perhaps they should live next door and just visit now and then.”  Katherine Hepburn

Rick and I have seen some great times and some tough times. We don't always get along and we don't always agree. There are times I am certain we've both thought about whether this is where we wanted to be. I have no clue what the next 14 years will bring but then again I would have never guessed the events of the last 14 years.  I do know that in August 1997  I met a guy who made me laugh so much that  my stomach hurt and that same guy continues to make me laugh each and every day and as long as we continue to laugh, we will be ok.

“Let there be spaces in your togetherness, And let the winds of the heavens dance between you. Love one another but make not a bond of love: Let it rather be a moving sea between the shores of your souls. Fill each other's cup but drink not from one cup. Give one another of your bread but eat not from the same loaf. Sing and dance together and be joyous, but let each one of you be alone, Even as the strings of a lute are alone though they quiver with the same music. Give your hearts, but not into each other's keeping. For only the hand of Life can contain your hearts. And stand together, yet not too near together: For the pillars of the temple stand apart, And the oak tree and the cypress grow not in each other's shadow.”
― Khalil Gibran, The Prophet


getting all teary eyed

Hard to believe tomorrow marks 14 years of marriage. I've been following a blogger who marks her family and memory posts with #yearsareminutes. I really love that sentiment. It really is amazing how quickly time passes. I am not sure I ever imagined my life at this point. I am working on some super deep thoughts about 14 years of marriage but in the meantime I am getting sappy looking through photos.

Me and Pete relaxing with beer at the reception. What I would give to eat that meal again.

Me and my peeps getting ready to head out to the church.


When Being a Dad Wasn't Cool

Happy Belated Father’s Day to all my favorite dads.

Like most girls, I think my dad is the greatest guy in the world. The guy who set the standards for all others. My dad is one of those dads that knows the answer to any question, can fix just about anything that is broke, can make you a better meal than you’d have at most restaurants, rarely gets upset about anything, and is just fun to be around. Those are really big shoes to fill.

There is an urban legend in the Flisakowski household about a time when my parents were first married and living in Tucson while my dad went to college.  My mom was responsible for making dinner and one night my dad came home to what my mom said was 7 layer dip/casserole but was lacking about 4 layers. From that day forward, my dad took over the cooking for the family. I never questioned this or thought it was odd in any way until I was in middle school and people would comment on the fact that my dad cooked. It was always a bit of shock for most of my friends but once they ate his cooking they understood why.  My parents raised me to accept non-traditional, whether it be that women can be whatever she wants or that a dad can cook kick-ass dinners. I don’t think it is something they intentionally set out to do as parents but it is an aspect of my childhood that I cherish and hope I am passing on to my children. 

Almost 11 years ago, Rick and I were new parents to this fabulous little guy. We did what most couples in our generation do when they have kids and hunted down the best daycare program regardless of the cost for him. And while neither of us loved sending him to daycare we were content with our decision until we had a series of unsatisfactory interactions with the daycare that culminated in a day of finding out that JT had sat in a highchair in a poopy diaper for almost 2 hours while the worker-bee worked to get her room clean so when the last parent pick up was over she could leave and get her own kids. I don’t blame her. She was in a tough spot, working a minimum wage job that she didn't like while raising kids and trying to go to school. As parents we were livid and in that moment we made one the biggest decisions of our life: Rick would become a Stay at Home Dad. Rick would leave a job that he had no passion for, that he commuted almost an hour each way to get to, and that was basically paying for daycare and become the primary care giver. We didn't know what we were doing but it felt right.

When we made this change, we didn't think we were trend setters. We were just a family doing what we need to do for our family. When we’d let others know our situation we were met with support from friends and family and we met some great friends through the Austin Stay at Home Dads group. We were also met with millions of questions and comments when we mentioned Rick’s new job. There were lots of dumb comments like, “You trust him to be at home with your child(ren)?”, “Why wouldn't you stay at home instead?” and “Does he feel like less of a man staying at home?”

It hasn't always been easy. There are days Rick wants to quit and he never really gets vacation time. And of course financially this hasn't been easy but money comes and goes. In my heart I believe that the boys will look back and remember that their days were filled with adventures and laughter with their dad and that as a family we got to spend more time together than apart. My hope is that they will pay that forward when they have their own families; they might decide they want to stay at home with their kids or at the very least they will see that there are no set roles in a marriage but rather two people that work together to create a loving, fun home for their family.

And while the world may not have been ready for Modern Dads it is great to see that media outlets like the Today Show are realizing that non-traditional families are not disappearing and we need to embrace them in every form and listen to their voices.  The Today Show has changed their site page from Today Mom to Today Parents and they are following a group of dad bloggers including a dad (Adrian Kulp) that did some writing for Modern Dads.

And just for some fun internet viewing, you can go back to last August when Kathy Lee confirmed that SAHD have gone from “creepy to cool” and our first segment ever on the Today Show in 2008 when the talk of stay at homes dad was just starting.

 What are the chances of appearing twice on the Today Show and not because we were arrested!


catching up

I finally uploaded photos from my camera looking for a photo from graduation.  Sadly I didn't get a good shot mainly because we were stuck in the way back. 5th grade graduation was a bit more overwhelming than I had hoped for mainly because the chickens were not  in a mood (which really translates to me being totally foolish in thinking they'd sit quietly for over an hour in a crowd of clapping people) and there were just a lot more people than I had anticipated.

So here is my one, super fuzzy photo and to make up for one super bad photo I've added in a chicken photo. They love playing with the hose.

                                                Chicken cheat sheet - that is Lulu with the hose